Anyone have advice on anxiety - dealing with it quickly

[Soma | 73]

Hello again fellow nerds - it's a long-time lurker here trying to get some input from the community since I think y'all are some stand-up dudes.  I've been dealing with anxiety lately that I can only describe as crushing.  Couple that with a bit of tendency to obsess, and I'm really struggling to get past the thoughts in my head.  Sorry that's kind of vague, but I was wondering if others have ways they deal with anxiety.  Thank y'all in advance for just being here.

[captmorgandrinker | 1,649]

Quickly?  Nope.

Had similar issues myself.    Try to make sure you're getting enough sleep (hard on those bad days, but get as much as you can), go for some walks or exercise, and stay busy either reading or with any activity you like.

Maybe a Vitamin D supplement too; that has helped me some.

Not sure what's causing your anxiety, but hopefully the cause of it can resolve itself to the point that you're not anxious about it as much anymore.

It sucks, but it does pass.

 

[BriGuy82 | 771]

There's really no quick fix though. No caffeine/stimulants, try to find a good anxiety work book on Amazon. I used to have one a while ago. It helped to read it and go through the exercises. I cant remember the name of the one I had unfortunately. When I was younger, I used to self medicate with alcohol but one of the problems with that is your anxiety can have a bounce back, so to speak, after you sober up and can actually increase. You should definitely seek treatment from a doctor though if it's that bad. There's no need to suffer. Good luck.

[Soma | 73]

22 minutes ago, captmorgandrinker said:

Quickly?  Nope.

Had similar issues myself.    Try to make sure you're getting enough sleep (hard on those bad days, but get as much as you can), go for some walks or exercise, and stay busy either reading or with any activity you like.

Maybe a Vitamin D supplement too; that has helped me some.

Not sure what's causing your anxiety, but hopefully the cause of it can resolve itself to the point that you're not anxious about it as much anymore.

It sucks, but it does pass.

 

Thank you - gonna look into vitamin d.  Also my God do I need that - someone telling me it WILL pass

[Kguillemette | 1,545]

I deal with it best by staying ahead of it. Ive gotten to the point that I usually can feel an attack coming on and can turn my focus into something else to keep it from coming on too strong. If I'm at work, I focus hard on my station. If at home I usually play drums.

Getting plenty of rest is important for me also, as @captmorgandrinker mentioned. If I am exhausted, I can sometimes be powerless to keep one from happening.

If it's too late and I'm full on attack mode, my best solution has been to smoke a little weed to relax some and work on projects around the house. I do some cleaning, carpet shampooing, rearrange electronics, assemble/repair furniture, anything really to keep level.

It's been 6 months since I've had a full on attack. They usually last a day or two for me when they happen, but they do always pass.

Hope you feel better soon!

 

[BortLicensePlate | 652]

The first step is probably try to find what the source of stress is and if there's a way to resolve that. 

I think its important to keep your mind sharp, learn new things, experiment and get creative. Just find things that you enjoy doing that help you grow as a person. I find the biggest cause of stress and anxiety for me is stagnation and complacency. I am always thinking about the future, my goals and what I'm doing to achieve them, and to me if I am seeing progress that reduces my anxiety tremendously.

Also, don't be afraid to talk to your friends and loved ones. They'll be happy to help anyway they can and sometimes just venting is the best way to clear your mind of all the stress.

[Soma | 73]

7 minutes ago, BriGuy82 said:

There's really no quick fix though. No caffeine/stimulants, try to find a good anxiety work book on Amazon. I used to have one a while ago. It helped to read it and go through the exercises. I cant remember the name of the one I had unfortunately. When I was younger, I used to self medicate with alcohol but one of the problems with that is your anxiety can have a bounce back, so to speak, after you sober up and can actually increase. You should definitely seek treatment from a doctor though if it's that bad. There's no need to suffer. Good luck.

Man this might be some real solid advice for me.  I stopped drinking completely from having done so religiously for years back in 2014.  I 100% feel as though my anxiety has gone up and up since then.  It's gotten worse and worse as time has passed.  The real scary thing is that I never had any anxiety problems EVER before.  I didn't even understand the word or what an anxiety attack really was, but now it's unfortunately a very familiar concept. 

I also drink a lot of caffeine, and realize it's probably not good. I can use the same obsessive thinking I used to quit alcohol to try to stop myself from that habit too I think though.

Thank you for the reply - I'm struggling today

[Soma | 73]

4 minutes ago, BortLicensePlate said:

The first step is probably try to find what the source of stress is and if there's a way to resolve that. 

I think its important to keep your mind sharp, learn new things, experiment and get creative. Just find things that you enjoy doing that help you grow as a person. I find the biggest cause of stress and anxiety for me is stagnation and complacency. I am always thinking about the future, my goals and what I'm doing to achieve them, and to me if I am seeing progress that reduces my anxiety tremendously.

Also, don't be afraid to talk to your friends and loved ones. They'll be happy to help anyway they can and sometimes just venting is the best way to clear your mind of all the stress.

This hits close to home - I always feel less anxious when I progress with something.  Probably why I'm struggling so hard - I'm off of work because of the snow.  

A lot of stressful things have happened to me lately.  One of the major ones being that suddenly I can't talk to my former best friend.  Kind of my only friend unfortunately.  Feels devastating.  I'm struggling to reach out - that's why I made this topic really.  I don't have family near me and a severe lack of people I can talk to right now in my life.  

I found out I have to move by the summer and that adds to my stress because I'm a bit of a hoarder and have no good prospect or resources to move yet.  Thank you for letting me kind of vent virtually

 

[Kimbolemonslice | 120]

I've had anxiety as long as I could remember but for about a one year span from 2016-2017 I was having non stop panic attacks, which lead for me to obsess thinking about having another panic attack. I was barely sleeping and thought there was no end in sight. Eventually I had to go on disability for a bit and go to a hospital for help. It was group therapy which is horrible for me (also having social anxiety) but that in addition to being put on medicine for a short period worked wonders. Since 2017 my anxiety has been manageable and I have only had 2 panic attacks since.

[BriGuy82 | 771]

@Soma caffeine can be a contributing factor. If you can cut back and possibly eliminate the caffeine, and just find a little time time for some light exercise, you'll be sleeping like a baby. Those are just basic things though. Like I said, there's no shame in seeking professional help. There are so many different things they can do to help and send you in the right direction. You can definitely get it under control. But you gotta do the work. 

[Soma | 73]

2 minutes ago, Kimbolemonslice said:

I've had anxiety as long as I could remember but for about a one year span from 2016-2017 I was having non stop panic attacks, which lead for me to obsess thinking about having another panic attack. I was barely sleeping and thought there was no end in sight. Eventually I had to go on disability for a bit and go to a hospital for help. It was group therapy which is horrible for me (also having social anxiety) but that in addition to being put on medicine for a short period worked wonders. Since 2017 my anxiety has been manageable and I have only had 2 panic attacks since.

That's interesting - I'm so sorry you dealt with that, I know that's like the closest thing to Hell in real life for me.

I have been wanting to get some sort of therapy on and off for years - even moreso now.  I've dealt with a lot of pain from my past on my own and I feel like it's maybe culminating to some bad point.  I don't have health insurance though and could only think to reach out to a co-worker whose partner is a therapist - only for advice for a referral or something, anything.  From their lack of response, I don't think they have the time for me.  So I'm not sure how to reach out for help.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Soma | 73]

7 minutes ago, BriGuy82 said:

@Soma caffeine can be a contributing factor. If you can cut back and possibly eliminate the caffeine, and just find a little time time for some light exercise, you'll be sleeping like a baby. Those are just basic things though. Like I said, there's no shame in seeking professional help. There are so many different things they can do to help and send you in the right direction. You can definitely get it under control. But you gotta do the work. 

You know what's fucked up is that I've had the urge to drink lately because some sort of logic deep in my head telling me that would help the anxiety

 

 

[Kimbolemonslice | 120]

10 minutes ago, Soma said:

That's interesting - I'm so sorry you dealt with that, I know that's like the closest thing to Hell in real life for me.

I have been wanting to get some sort of therapy on and off for years - even moreso now.  I've dealt with a lot of pain from my past on my own and I feel like it's maybe culminating to some bad point.  I don't have health insurance though and could only think to reach out to a co-worker whose partner is a therapist - only for advice for a referral or something, anything.  From their lack of response, I don't think they have the time for me.  So I'm not sure how to reach out for help.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The two things/ thoughts my therapist always stressed was instead of dwelling on if bad things will happen start to think " what if everything works out?" And a bunch of mindfulness exercises you can find some on youtube. Hang in there it will pass

Edited February 17, 2021 by Kimbolemonslice

[BriGuy82 | 771]

4 minutes ago, Soma said:

You know what's fucked up is that I've had the urge to drink lately because some sort of logic deep in my head telling me that would help the anxiety

 

 

That's not fucked up, it's pretty logical. The problem is It's just a short term solution that can turn into a whole set of other problems. When you get the opportunity/ insurance I would definitely recommend to go see a doctor. They usually would prescribe you something and then set you up to go talk to a therapist. Talking to someone is key and they've done many studies to prove how much it can help. They might give you homework, recommend a workbook or do exercises on your own time to help you improve the symptoms as well. Believe me, that shit works if you can keep an open mind and not be stubborn. 

[captmorgandrinker | 1,649]

27 minutes ago, Soma said:

I found out I have to move by the summer and that adds to my stress because I'm a bit of a hoarder and have no good prospect or resources to move yet.  Thank you for letting me kind of vent virtually

 

Start throwing some stuff away.   Even just going through a box or bin a day will work wonders by the summer, and that'll be one less thing to worry about?

[Soma | 73]

4 minutes ago, BriGuy82 said:

That's not fucked up, it's pretty logical. The problem is It's just a short term solution that can turn into a whole set of other problems. When you get the opportunity/ insurance I would definitely recommend to go see a doctor. They usually would prescribe you something and then set you up to go talk to a therapist. Talking to someone is key and they've done many studies to prove how much it can help. They might give you homework, recommend a workbook or do exercises on your own time to help you improve the symptoms as well. Believe me, that shit works if you can keep an open mind and not be stubborn. 

Man I'm STARVING for this - you have no idea

[BortLicensePlate | 652]

12 minutes ago, Kimbolemonslice said:

The two things/ thoughts my therapist always stressed was instead of dwelling on if bad things will happen start to think " what if everything works out?" And a bunch of mindfulness exercises you can find some on youtube. Hang in there it will pass

I've heard people talking about gratitude journals, which sounds like a bunch of horseshit at first but all you gotta do is take 5 minutes in the morning to write down a couple things you are thankful for or excited about. They could be the smallest things, but seeing these little triumphs on paper and starting your day by thinking positively can have a great impact on your mood and avoid the negativity thats weighing you down.

[Soma | 73]

3 minutes ago, captmorgandrinker said:

Start throwing some stuff away.   Even just going through a box or bin a day will work wonders by the summer, and that'll be one less thing to worry about?

Yeah I'm doing my best to motivate myself to do this exact thing while I have the free time right now.  I think I used collecting as a sort of therapy activity to focus on over the years.  I see some irony that I'm having to face the result of that now

[Soma | 73]

1 minute ago, BortLicensePlate said:

I've heard people talking about gratitude journals, which sounds like a bunch of horseshit at first but all you gotta do is take 5 minutes in the morning to write down a couple things you are thankful for or excited about. They could be the smallest things, but seeing these little triumphs on paper and starting your day by thinking positively can have a great impact on your mood and avoid the negativity thats weighing you down.

At this point I'm open to horseshit.  But this sounds like a good idea in order to shift my focus - something I desperately need.  I'm going to try this too - thank you

[RH | 4,918]

7 minutes ago, Kimbolemonslice said:

The two things/ thoughts my therapist always stressed was instead of dwelling on if bad things will happen start to think " what if everything works out?" And a bunch of mindfulness exercises you can find some on youtube. Hang in there it will pass

I came here to post something similar.  First, we are all just average guys and gals on here.  Well, maybe there's a trained counselor on here, but I'm guessing not. Regardless, we can all give you suggestions from our own personal experiences, but your personal experience will likely be different and highly contingent on your own, personal experience of what is the root cause.

That said, I have had to manage anxiety and depression over the past few months.  I'll spare the details, but I've been suffering from chronic skin pain that breaks my focus and causes me to get usually about 2-4 hours of sleep each night.  Tomorrow, I'm meeting with a counselor for the first time because though some strategies I've found and read have helped some, eventually you may simply need professional help and there is nothing wrong with that.

But, if you're not at that point, here are some tips that can help.  They've helped me often.  Not magic bullets, but they help better than nothing.

1. You need to get the mental "train" off of the anxiety track.  Trying to stop being anxious, especially about one specific issues, is like say "stop thinking about a pink elephant".  The more you try to NOT think about something, the more you do think about.  Intentional distraction can help, but this doesn't help dissipate the feelings that can come back quickly, and haunt you.  A tactic that my wife found that works for her and myself is to stop and verbally say "Yes, that is a thought.  [State the problem you're thinking about can happen] but it's not happening now."  Specifically, what this is doing is acknowledging the thoughts and feelings but also recognizing that, usually, those worries have no bearing on the moment.  Verbally speaking that you are having the thought and the feeling, but also verbally acknowledging that it is not a problem today, can disarm the moment.

2. After step one, I do breathing exercises.  It can be as simple a taking a slow breath in, and a slower exhale out.  Breath in through your nose, out through your mouth.  Do this 3-5 times and that can often reset your mental state.

3. After breathing through the tension, try to move on to something productive or fun.  If at any time the thoughts come back, no big deal.  Pause what you are doing and do steps 1 & 2 again.  Eventually, you will gain tools to come down your nerves.

Regarding my personal experience, this has worked well, but my chronic issues are very-real and immediately effecting me.  Breathing and acknowledging the pain in the moment only works so far or for so much when the experience gets worse.  That's why I'm seeking counselling. I know there is more that I can do, but I could really use the advice from someone who has helped others struggling with chronic suffering.  Your experience may not be as bad as mine (and that's ok, this is not a comparison game) but if at any point these strategies, or others you find in self-help resources do not work, never be afraid to seek outside assistance.

[Soma | 73]

5 minutes ago, RH said:

I came here to post something similar.  First, we are all just average guys and gals on here.  Well, maybe there's a trained counselor on here, but I'm guessing not. Regardless, we can all give you suggestions from our own personal experiences, but your personal experience will likely be different and highly contingent on your own, personal experience of what is the root cause.

That said, I have had to manage anxiety and depression over the past few months.  I'll spare the details, but I've been suffering from chronic skin pain that breaks my focus and causes me to get usually about 2-4 hours of sleep each night.  Tomorrow, I'm meeting with a counselor for the first time because though some strategies I've found and read have helped some, eventually you may simply need professional help and there is nothing wrong with that.

But, if you're not at that point, here are some tips that can help.  They've helped me often.  Not magic bullets, but they help better than nothing.

1. You need to get the mental "train" off of the anxiety track.  Trying to stop being anxious, especially about one specific issues, is like say "stop thinking about a pink elephant".  The more you try to NOT think about something, the more you do think about.  Intentional distraction can help, but this doesn't help dissipate the feelings that can come back quickly, and haunt you.  A tactic that my wife found that works for her and myself is to stop and verbally say "Yes, that is a thought.  [State the problem you're thinking about can happen] but it's not happening now."  Specifically, what this is doing is acknowledging the thoughts and feelings but also recognizing that, usually, those worries have no bearing on the moment.  Verbally speaking that you are having the thought and the feeling, but also verbally acknowledging that it is not a problem today, can disarm the moment.

2. After step one, I do breathing exercises.  It can be as simple a taking a slow breath in, and a slower exhale out.  Breath in through your nose, out through your mouth.  Do this 3-5 times and that can often reset your mental state.

3. After breathing through the tension, try to move on to something productive or fun.  If at any time the thoughts come back, no big deal.  Pause what you are doing and do steps 1 & 2 again.  Eventually, you will gain tools to come down your nerves.

Regarding my personal experience, this has worked well, but my chronic issues are very-real and immediately effecting me.  Breathing and acknowledging the pain in the moment only works so far or for so much when the experience gets worse.  That's why I'm seeking counselling. I know there is more that I can do, but I could really use the advice from someone who has helped others struggling with chronic suffering.  Your experience may not be as bad as mine (and that's ok, this is not a comparison game) but if at any point these strategies, or others you find in self-help resources do not work, never be afraid to seek outside assistance.

I'm happy you found help - it is inspiring and I don't feel bad in any way toward getting help.  I think I really need some extra help, but I'm afraid I'm out of luck for lack of insurance/$.  I'm not aware of any free help

Edited February 17, 2021 by Soma

[RH | 4,918]

Just now, Soma said:

I'm happy you found help - it is inspiring and I don't feel bad in any way toward getting help.  I think I really need some extra help, but I'm afraid I'm out of luck for pack of insurance/$.  I'm not aware of any free help

Well, the only help that I can give you regarding resources is that I am aware of multiple non-profit counselling centers that offer tiered pricing based off of income level.  That's good news and with COVID, most of them do counselling online, so you could find a counsellor anywhere.

[fcgamer | 4,729]

I've always felt much more mentally sound on the rare stretches of my life when I've been consistently working out, be it lifting weights, jogging, or cycling.

Although I haven't done it for years, playing piano also used to soothe me in so many ways.

[Soma | 73]

51 minutes ago, RH said:

Well, the only help that I can give you regarding resources is that I am aware of multiple non-profit counselling centers that offer tiered pricing based off of income level.  That's good news and with COVID, most of them do counselling online, so you could find a counsellor anywhere.

Looking into this will be a priority for me - thank you

[Soma | 73]

14 minutes ago, fcgamer said:

I've always felt much more mentally sound on the rare stretches of my life when I've been consistently working out, be it lifting weights, jogging, or cycling.

Although I haven't done it for years, playing piano also used to soothe me in so many ways.

Thank you for the kind advice - I'm trying my best to focus on physical or creative activities to take my mind off of things.  I happen to have a piano that I rarely play - may take some time to mess around, hopefully without making myself sadder!