Masks in public/at the park

[Hammerfestus | 3,833]

1 hour ago, Code Monkey said:

If you do go back outside, you are now first in line to go inside once 3 persons come out. Another customer parks their car, bypasses the line and asks you to excuse him so he can go inside, grab some free items placed 4 metres inside and then leave again. Do you let him in?

[fcgamer | 4,722]

1 hour ago, Code Monkey said:

It looks like this discussion is veering wildly so I'm curious if you want to have input on an interaction I had recently, I'm very interested in how you would have reacted since it appears we think very differently.

You're at a store and there's a lineup outside because the store occupancy is at limit. One person comes out, one person goes in. A sign on the door states the government mandated restriction of 9 maximum persons allowed in this particular store at one time. You get to the front of the line, one person comes out, you go in and you count 12 total persons inside, plus employees. Do you stay inside or do you go back outside to follow the rules?

If you do go back outside, you are now first in line to go inside once 3 persons come out. Another customer parks their car, bypasses the line and asks you to excuse him so he can go inside, grab some free items placed 4 metres inside and then leave again. Do you let him in?

Tell him to get in the back, if he doesn't listen, tell him again while stretching your body out to prevent his entry into the store.

[Tanooki | 4,932]

On 1/2/2021 at 5:48 PM, Code Monkey said:

What I think as someone that doesn't live in Colorado, doesn't have kids and very much dislikes kids. You asked for my opinion so here goes.

• It sounds like you handled it the same way I would have at first, politely tell the kid you'd rather he have a mask. I don't know if you told him to leave or something.
• Assuming the rule is exempt for children under 10, it also doesn't sound like she did anything wrong. She stayed away from the park because she didn't have a mask but allowed her kid to go there, fully within the rules. When you mentioned you had a problem with it, she told you why he is exempt.....he's 4. That makes sense.
• You made your decision to bring your child to an area where there is risk and danger, somewhere other children are not required to wear masks and you tried to alter the rules for others. I totally don't mind if someone else wants to break the rules for themselves but I would not be happy with someone else telling me I need to follow a different set of rules because they feel like it. It sounds like you have a problem with the rule set at parks so you need to talk to your local ward councillor, not the other parents at the park. Or don't go to the park.
• I don't understand giving someone the middle finger, it happens to me in traffic all the time, I don't understand it. So you showed me your finger.........I don't get it. This seems to me like the lowest form of neanderthal communication I could possibly imagine, I always try and place myself in the mind set of someone so low on the communication totem pole that they show someone else their finger as a message. Someone has to please explain to me why I'm supposed to be offended because I always just end up feeling badly for that person instead.
• I am truly amazed you did that in front of your child, that shocks me but maybe it wouldn't if I had kids. To actively show your kids that giving another person the middle finger just because they tried to educate you on the proper rule set is appalling, why would you show them that? I see parents in public all the time dragging their kids across the street outside of a cross walk and I just wonder to myself if that parent gets surprised when their kid does something stupid. I would have said the same thing to you.
• She also let you know her opinion is valid, she works in the medical field and she's within the government mandated rules. She explained all of this to you nicely and you gave her the middle finger again, then you yelled and swore at her. In front of your kid. Weird, man.

I don't know you and I'm assuming you gave me the correct information about the rules and exemptions here.

Just going to quote this as I feel exactly the same here after reading it and only having that to go by.  James was in the wrong entirely, and ramped up that wrongness giving the woman the bird.  That said, she deserved the second set using that token pity card of being a health care worker like that suddenly in a pandemic suddenly makes you some entitled hero to special ass kissing and consideration.  No, it doesn't, it's your job you chose in life, and that doesn't give you a right to use it as a weaponized excuse for your actions or to get special treatment.

[darkchylde28 | 1,546]

I think you were mostly in the right here, @JamesRobot.  I think you might have gone a bit far with the double deuce, but if the lady acted as totally ignorant as you've described and escalated things as quickly, I understand the reaction and see it as understandable, if unfortunate, given the circumstances.  While I wouldn't have taken my kids out in that manner (I'm also incredibly careful & paranoid, but my wife is at the top of the list of at-risk folks, so I take zero chances that I don't have to), I think you set the "ground rules" for everything appropriately and the lady was well out of line across the board.

While all the naysayers are harping on about how kids under 10 aren't legally required to wear masks, how they likely won't be affected by it should they pick it up, etc., they seem to forget something very imporant:  Those same kids are going to be around adults, and those adults very well may have picked up the virus.  Whether those kids actively get sick or not, they can quickly and easily become carriers.  And what happens when those non-mask-wearing-carrier kids play with non-carrier-mask-wearing kids?  There's a much higher chance the kids being safe pick it up and transmit it to their parents, grandparents, etc., even if they never show the first symptom.  That's right, folks, kids can very easily become disease vectors.  Hence why I haven't taken my kids to play at any playgrounds since this thing began, even if they're empty--kids who have been exposed could have been on the equipment, my kids could pick it up, then bring it home.

I think some folks are missing the point here about this being more about what's right and wrong versus what's strictly legal and illegal.  How far do you really want to toe that line?  I mean, strictly speaking, what happened in Germany leading up to and during WWII was technically legal, since the Germans set their own laws.  Lots of terrible things happened in the Southern states in the US that were perfectly legal up until the 60s or so.  Would folks have really been nitpicking about who was right and who was wrong by the letter of the law in those instances?  Sure, almost totally different situations, except that what's legal in each of those scenarios as well as this one could easily, and legally, lead to the death of someone who doesn't deserve it and did what they could to prevent bringing it upon themselves.  So again, who's really in the wrong here?

 

[Bearcat-Doug | 5,104]

On 1/2/2021 at 6:14 PM, Richardhead said:

Can you add “Should have body checked the 4 year old” to the poll?

I can only picture @JamesRobot cutting the kid off at the pass like this now.

[Boosted52405 | 178]

@darkchylde28To clarify a little bit based on your response, there was very little feedback in this thread relating to the warranting of the kid wearing a mask.  Pretty much everyone agrees with that aspect of it, the Mom was totally wrong there.  The issue is that the OP simply cannot boss people around in a public park, at all - to take that further and cause a scene including throwing up one then double deuces in front of children, yeah absolutely none of that was appropriate.  The OP is a public guest at that park, not some enforcer of lawful yet socially inappropriate behavior.

[darkchylde28 | 1,546]

6 hours ago, Boosted52405 said:

@darkchylde28To clarify a little bit based on your response, there was very little feedback in this thread relating to the warranting of the kid wearing a mask.  Pretty much everyone agrees with that aspect of it, the Mom was totally wrong there.  The issue is that the OP simply cannot boss people around in a public park, at all - to take that further and cause a scene including throwing up one then double deuces in front of children, yeah absolutely none of that was appropriate.  The OP is a public guest at that park, not some enforcer of lawful yet socially inappropriate behavior.

You seem to forget that while not everyplace has mask requirements for children in place, they do have measures in place requiring adults to wear them as well as softly enforced social distancing requirements meant to keep folks from passing this modern day plague back and forth between each other.  With this in mind, as OP and his children were in the public park first, they were well within their rights to tell anyone arriving after them to stay out of their 6 foot bubble of personal space as mandated in virtually all social distancing guidelines.  What you and others can't seem to fathom is that neither @JamesRobot nor his children were trying to kick anyone else out of the public park or dictate their actions beyond "stay at least 6 feet away from us," which would preclude the newcomer from playing near (within 6 feet of) his kids, who were already occupying the swings.

If you agree that the woman was out of line (which seems to encompass the concept of her bringing her kid to the public park unmasked and expecting that they would be allowed to play nearby other children present), I'm unable to understand or reconcile within my mind how you can try to throw OP under the bus for anything beyond a little (understandable) unfortunate display due to escalation from the newcomer mom.  Have you looked up the social distancing rules (laws) currently in place for Colorado?  Folks have been all aflutter about OP telling someone else's kid not to play near his, and yet the rules on the book in Colorado (as well as where I live) require non-household members to stay at least 6 feet away from one another.  Please, find me a swing set where the next swing over (if there was one free at all--can't recall seeing any posts in this thread stating that was the case) is more than 6 feet away from the previous one.  Beyond that, please find me the excited-to-be-outside 4 year old that you can expect to remember and respect the distances they're required to stay from other people in our current times.  If you can find that latter one, I'll cover one of the ones I know with glitter, give them a Coke, then cut them loose near you and see how sparkle-free you are at the end of the play session near you.

Was OP perhaps a little overzealous in his reaction to the kid?  If you read between the lines (as he states nothing that indicates such), sure.  But given the seriousness of what's going on?  Not at all.  Just because someone else doesn't grasp or take seriously the potential gravity of what's going on around them doesn't mean that OP or anyone else should have to suffer the potential consequences of that ignorance.  And, let's not forget that you've just set out to deliberately point out that OP is a guest in a public park...as is the woman who arrived after him.  So, to be perfectly fair, you can't expect him to give up the area he and his family have been enjoying simply because someone else shows up.  Based on the fact that OP reached out to the community for either reassurance or criticism of how he reacted that had the newcomer mom actually asked politely if/when her kid could have a turn at the swings if he wasn't allowed to invade their personal space (per mandated social distancing rules/laws in CO), OP would have either asked his kids to hurry up so the newcomer kid could have a turn or gone ahead and told them to move on to another part of the park.  That didn't happen, things escalated due to someone violating and wanting to further violate mask and social distancing guidelines, and thus here we are.

To directly address your concept that OP isn't some sort of law enforcer, well, I guess the next time someone threatens me, my family, my property, etc., I guess I'll just lay down and let it happen versus taking any sort of opposing position, action, etc., as it's not my place to act as an enforcer of a law I know to be in place, even if could potentially result in the death of me, my family, etc.  ...right?

[JamesRobot | 5,793]

31 minutes ago, darkchylde28 said:

What you and others can't seem to fathom is that neither @JamesRobot nor his children were trying to kick anyone else out of the public park or dictate their actions beyond "stay at least 6 feet away from us," which would preclude the newcomer from playing near (within 6 feet of) his kids, who were already occupying the swings.

Correct.  I didn't even tell the kid that he couldn't use the swings.  He wasn't even interested in the swings.  He was specifically interested in me.  Most likely as a prelude to playing with my kids.  Which, as I mentioned, was not bound to happen.

[Boosted52405 | 178]

59 minutes ago, darkchylde28 said:

You seem to forget that while not everyplace has mask requirements for children in place, they do have measures in place requiring adults to wear them as well as softly enforced social distancing requirements meant to keep folks from passing this modern day plague back and forth between each other.  With this in mind, as OP and his children were in the public park first, they were well within their rights to tell anyone arriving after them to stay out of their 6 foot bubble of personal space as mandated in virtually all social distancing guidelines.  What you and others can't seem to fathom is that neither @JamesRobot nor his children were trying to kick anyone else out of the public park or dictate their actions beyond "stay at least 6 feet away from us," which would preclude the newcomer from playing near (within 6 feet of) his kids, who were already occupying the swings.

This is great dialogue and feedback, however, it is NOT a first-come-first-serve situation - I would love to hear what a cop would say about this situation.  Let's say the Mom told the OP to piss off, what do you do now?  What right do you actually have?  None at all.  If you really wanted to call the cops (which would be a massive waste of their time), they would probably just tell the parents to ensure their kids are 6ft apart and dip out.  It's a civil issue with 0 laws bring broke.

If you think it's a first come first serve situation, what happens when family 3 arrives and their little ones are without masks too?  Family 4?  Does he freak out like a loose cannon on everyone?  No, you simply cut your losses, be mature and take your kid out of that situation (again, the OP was the one uncomfortable).  This is current life for everyone, we have to protect ourselves regarding the pandemic.

I never said there was a problem with talking with the parent or asking them to keep their distance, it's the fact that he bullied them out of the park by starting a pretty ridiculous sounding altercation.  The kid did NOT have to wear a mask per the law (although they should have been via the parents simply out of respect in the least).

I suggest to reread the first post, the OP is the instigator 100% and this is HIS side of the story (which was honorably honest).  Wonder what her side would say?  He says the kids can play together with masks (despite your 6ft non-family mandated declaration).  He even says he told the Mom he didn't care what she thought and he expected them to wear masks - again, not his place, at all.  She apparently makes a comment about being a nurse and he throws her the middle finger and beyond?  That's instigating and bullying behavior, I would have got my kid out of there too, that's the last kind of erratic behavior I want my kid around.

[Boosted52405 | 178]

1 hour ago, darkchylde28 said:

To directly address your concept that OP isn't some sort of law enforcer, well, I guess the next time someone threatens me, my family, my property, etc., I guess I'll just lay down and let it happen versus taking any sort of opposing position, action, etc., as it's not my place to act as an enforcer of a law I know to be in place, even if could potentially result in the death of me, my family, etc.  ...right?

And to comment on this, a little extreme, aye?  We're talking about some kids playing at a freaking park, not the park being ambushed by a ruthless gang wielding weapons trying to kidnap his kid.

If you go to a public park, you are opening the door for this stuff to happen - if you don't know that going in, well then you're blind.  The appropriate action, especially being a parent/role model, is to cut your losses and dip out.  Perhaps that's not extreme enough for ya.

[JamesRobot | 5,793]

15 minutes ago, Boosted52405 said:

OP is the instigator 100% and this is HIS side of the story

it's the fact that he bullied them out of the park by starting a pretty ridiculous sounding altercation. 

throws her the middle finger and beyond?  That's instigating and bullying behavior

No.  SHE started it!

Seriously, it is not my position that I'm a bully or even an instigator here.

Her first reaction was to yell across the park and my initial response was calm and civil.  She clearly didn't want to hear me and continued to yell, so it escalated.  Once that happens, civility is out the window whether I engage or not.  

I also think people take way too much offense to catching a finger.  It's a PG-13 gesture at best.  She completely lost her shit.  If I was a bully, I would have started calling names and threatening her.  Neither of which occurred.

 

37 minutes ago, Boosted52405 said:

If you go to a public park, you are opening the door for this stuff to happen -

I disagree.  If someone wants to be left alone.  Leave em alone.  My kids have run into other kids at the park who are antisocial and they just leave them alone.  Go do something else.

 

1 hour ago, Boosted52405 said:

The appropriate action, especially being a parent/role model, is to cut your losses and dip out. 

I agree.  As soon as she gave me the business, I should've just made my Sega reference and dipped.

[Jeevan | 8,910]

On 1/3/2021 at 4:39 PM, Gloves said:

I tell him to get to the back of the line and I call the police if it escalates beyond that.

[Gloves | 11,771]

34 minutes ago, Jeevan said:

This is precisely what will happen.

[Boosted52405 | 178]

43 minutes ago, JamesRobot said:

No.  SHE started it!

Seriously, it is not my position that I'm a bully or even an instigator here.

Her first reaction was to yell across the park and my initial response was calm and civil.  She clearly didn't want to hear me and continued to yell, so it escalated.  Once that happens, civility is out the window whether I engage or not.  

I also think people take way too much offense to catching a finger.  It's a PG-13 gesture at best.  She completely lost her shit.  If I was a bully, I would have started calling names and threatening her.  Neither of which occurred.

Ok, based on your original post, it 100% appears you went 0-100 in a matter of seconds, in public, not only in front of your kid, but a stranger's kid.  You actually don't share much information about what the Mom said, other than "blah blah", "i stopped listening to her", "I told her I don't care"...please re-read your OP in neutral shoes.

As for the catching a finger thing, are you kidding me?  You are doing this around a stranger's 4yo child and also your kid (not sure how old your kid is).  Not only are they going to eventually mimick that behavior, that erratic behavior in general can/will leave a lasting impression on kids.  You even said your kiddo told you it was too much, hmm...

From everything I've read so far, she really didn't come off as a "Karen", but rather how about any parent you'd confront at a park in the manner you detailed out in the OP.  If anything, you really came off as a Karen based on the info provided.

[Gloves | 11,771]

I mean personally I don't see cursing as a bad thing. Americans are kinda funny in that way. Graphic violence on tv a-ok, but say fuck or show a nip and CONTROVERSY!

[fcgamer | 4,722]

People keep talking about the role model thing, well tbh the woman is being a very poor role model, not wearing a mask during a pandemic, yelling, etc.

[Quest4Nes | 376]

 

[Quest4Nes | 376]

6 minutes ago, Gloves said:

I mean personally I don't see cursing as a bad thing. Americans are kinda funny in that way. Graphic violence on tv a-ok, but say fuck or show a nip and CONTROVERSY!

have you not been in america? we seem pretty good with profanity

 

What does this have to do with violence. This comparison doesnt really relate here. Did someone get stabbed here? Did I miss the good part of the story? 

 

Your perception of america is pretty 90s gloves.

Edited January 5, 2021 by Quest4Nes

[fcgamer | 4,722]

Just reread everything again. Furthermore, why is the other not with her kid? What's she doing, sitting on the bench playing on her phone?

Nothing wrong with telling the kid you don't want him or her playing with your kids.

If I bring my cat to the park, must and oblige and let it play with your dog? Lol.

Woman definitely escalated the situation, too dumb or too much of an arse to respect others' opinions. Could have been a great learning moment, she could have talked to her kid about the pandemic , importance of masks, and germs, but she instead chose to get antagonist.

[Boosted52405 | 178]

1 minute ago, fcgamer said:

Just reread everything again. Furthermore, why is the other not with her kid? What's she doing, sitting on the bench playing on her phone?

Nothing wrong with telling the kid you don't want him or her playing with your kids.

If I bring my cat to the park, must and oblige and let it play with your dog? Lol.

Woman definitely escalated the situation, too dumb or too much of an arse to respect others' opinions. Could have been a great learning moment, she could have talked to her kid about the pandemic , importance of masks, and germs, but she instead chose to get antagonist.

How did she escalate it, exactly?  By showing up without mask on kiddo?  Very little info was provided on what the Mom said, she really seemed to act about how any parent would act in that situation.  Totally agree she was in the wrong here too though, they both should have been masked for sure.

[darkchylde28 | 1,546]

2 hours ago, Boosted52405 said:

This is great dialogue and feedback, however, it is NOT a first-come-first-serve situation - I would love to hear what a cop would say about this situation.  Let's say the Mom told the OP to piss off, what do you do now?  What right do you actually have?  None at all.  If you really wanted to call the cops (which would be a massive waste of their time), they would probably just tell the parents to ensure their kids are 6ft apart and dip out.  It's a civil issue with 0 laws bring broke.

Actually, you seem to forget that one person's rights ends the moment that they begin to impede someone else's.  Also, in Colorado, at least, the social distancing rules are actually to be enforced by laws, the real legal penalties if folks don't obey them voluntarily.  Check it out.  Mom wasn't wearing a mask, and kid was clearly not thrilled about having to obey @JamesRobotabout not playing with his kids (something every parent has a legal right to permit or deny) or social distancing rules that were on the books.  If the mom didn't control her kid, I'd have removed myself and my kids from the situation then called the cops to come intervene, as it's ignorant folks like that that are allowing this to spread as badly as it has been.

2 hours ago, Boosted52405 said:

If you think it's a first come first serve situation, what happens when family 3 arrives and their little ones are without masks too?  Family 4?  Does he freak out like a loose cannon on everyone?  No, you simply cut your losses, be mature and take your kid out of that situation (again, the OP was the one uncomfortable).  This is current life for everyone, we have to protect ourselves regarding the pandemic.

If everybody's actually keeping their distance the way they should be and not trying to get their parents to override another parent's decision not to let the new arrivals play too near their kids, there's no issue or situation.  He didn't freak out like a loose cannon on anyone, he calmly told the kid no, he couldn't be so near his kids due to not wearing a mask, then started out calmly repeating that to the kid's mom, who subsequently escalated things.  It's not like he whipped out a gun and shouted, "FREEZE, ASSHOLES!" the moment mom and kid arrived unmasked in the park.  Pretty sure you've either misunderstood/misread OP's initial response or are creating a straw man to try to back up your own viewpoint on this.

2 hours ago, Boosted52405 said:

I never said there was a problem with talking with the parent or asking them to keep their distance, it's the fact that he bullied them out of the park by starting a pretty ridiculous sounding altercation.  The kid did NOT have to wear a mask per the law (although they should have been via the parents simply out of respect in the least).

Well, you keep painting OP as if he flew off the handle at the kid and mom the moment they arrived, so you kind of seem like you have a problem with him talking to the parent and asking them to keep their distance.  The kid (stupidly, in my opinion, see my disease vector comment in my original reply) technically didn't have to wear a mask, but per Colorado social distancing rules/laws, he did have to keep his distance and seemed to get upset when OP told him he'd have to do so (being sans mask).  Also, he didn't bully them out of the park, he calmly stated his position, the mom started flying off the handle about it and escalated things, then chose to leave versus continue the confrontation (that she fanned the flames on).  It's not like OP chased her to her car, both fingers held high and proud (although I admit I'd laugh like an idiot watching such a thing take place).

2 hours ago, Boosted52405 said:

I suggest to reread the first post, the OP is the instigator 100% and this is HIS side of the story (which was honorably honest).  Wonder what her side would say?  He says the kids can play together with masks (despite your 6ft non-family mandated declaration).  He even says he told the Mom he didn't care what she thought and he expected them to wear masks - again, not his place, at all.  She apparently makes a comment about being a nurse and he throws her the middle finger and beyond?  That's instigating and bullying behavior, I would have got my kid out of there too, that's the last kind of erratic behavior I want my kid around.

Instigating would imply intentionally starting a conflict.  OP first let the kid know what he was ok with, then the mom, and the mom escalated things.  If anyone instigated anything, it was the mom.  If it's instigating to tell people what you're not ok with, to stop doing something you have a right to object to (breaching social distancing perimeters sans mask, in this example), then we've got some real issues with how that term has been defined all these years.  Yes, things escalated, but only after the mom went "Karen" over being told calmly that her kid would need a mask before OP would be ok with her kid playing near his.  Given how tense this whole thing has most folks, I understand OP flying off the handle a bit, even if I don't think it was 100% appropriate.  He didn't start off there, he ended up there, after a mom who was already violating the mask ordinance for adults and who was clearly upset at having to actually watch her kid and police them from being within a certain distance from OP and his kids got pissed off about that and started flying off the handle.

2 hours ago, Boosted52405 said:

And to comment on this, a little extreme, aye?  We're talking about some kids playing at a freaking park, not the park being ambushed by a ruthless gang wielding weapons trying to kidnap his kid.

If you go to a public park, you are opening the door for this stuff to happen - if you don't know that going in, well then you're blind.  The appropriate action, especially being a parent/role model, is to cut your losses and dip out.  Perhaps that's not extreme enough for ya.

My wife already has heart and lung damage that put her in the roughly 1% of folks who, if they get this, they most likely won't survive.  So...no, I personally don't think I'm taking it too extremely.  In a world where I could come home from bringing required groceries from the store and somehow bring in a bug that might be totally issue free for myself and my kids but kill my wife quickly and mercilessly, I don't take any of this lightly or without care and forethought.  So, parents who won't wear masks who hang around at home with kids who aren't required to wear masks, then introduce those kids to other kids...it can easily, if never ill-intentionally, add up to killing someone else.  I agree that OP probably shouldn't have been at the park if he wanted to avoid the possibility of such a situation arising (one of the reasons I myself haven't taken my kids out--something I mentioned), but he was obeying all the social distancing guidelines currently in place in his state and dealing with someone who wasn't--and clearly had disdain for them, despite supposedly being part of the medical profession that has seen firsthand how awful this can get and has been getting.

The best resolution for OP would have to not been there to be involved at all, but seeing as he was, given the circumstances, I give him an all clear on everything except the flock of birds he cut loose at the end, and even then, I can understand it given the confrontation the lady started over him essentially stating his personal requirements for her kid to be any nearer to them than the current pandemic guidelines call for.

[Gloves | 11,771]

Just now, Boosted52405 said:

How did she escalate it, exactly?  By showing up without mask on kiddo?  Very little info was provided on what the Mom said, she really seemed to act about how any parent would act in that situation.  Totally agree she was in the wrong here too though, they both should have been masked for sure.

You might be misreading the original post.

1. OP goes to park w/ kids
2. A maskless child approaches him/his children
3. Due to OP's feelings regarding masks in a pandemic, he tells the child (presumably nicely) that they can't play with his kid(s) without a mask

This SHOULD be the end of it, for any reasonable parent. This was her chance to go "whatever, you don't HAVE to play with those kids" to her own child.

Now, likely 1 of 2 things happened in the next part, which is part of where OP maybe could have handled it more delicately, for me.

The child either:

1. Went back to their mother and told her verbatim what OP told them - you can't play with my kids without a mask
   1. OR
2. Went back to their mother and told her something closer to "the man said I need a mask to play"

See now, I do think #2 IS more likely - kids are simple. They see it all simple. It's this equals that. I can't play with the kids means I can't play at all, cuz that's the play I want.

If the kid went route 2, yeah maybe Mom is a bit justified in her mind saying "hey what the hell, how dare you tell my kid he needs a mask!" as that is not the rule (kids under 4 blah blah blah).

 

All that said, from OP's perspective, it basically ended at #3 waaay up at the top there, then suddenly he was confronted with an angry and seemingly unreasonable woman.

 

That's my takeaway.

[Boosted52405 | 178]

@darkchylde28Well we can certainly agree to disagree, but to ask, do you have kids?  Your comment about how the families should all play at the park and keep their distance tells me maybe not...park playgrounds are like a candy land for kids.  If there are 2-3-4 families at a single park, good luck keeping them all 6ft from one another!  It would be a mission impossible level adventure with all the parents in perfect coordination - just not feasible.

The link you provided is kind of a joke, can you provide an actual example of a single enforcement penalty?  There is little to no chance a cop or anyone is going to take action over 4 year olds on a public playground.  It is up to the parents to abide by the public health orders.  According to the OP, he was cool with the kids mingling if they had masks - isn't that breaking the rules too?

You say the Mom flew off the handle...when, when she said the kid was 4?  I don't get that at all from the first post.  You say she was the instigator, I really don't see that, I guess except when she showed up?

I guess my take on this is that the OP should have simply talked with the Mom and requested that she keep her kid away from his kid, for obvious reasons.  If she's unwilling to respect and honor that, then leave.  Nothing else you can do.  It doesn't sound like he attempted to work with her at all based on the OP.  It's neutral territory at a park playground and the kid does not have to wear a mask (but totally should).  It sounds like he came off hostile from the get go, but again, we were barely provided any information about "triggered Karen".

[Boosted52405 | 178]

20 minutes ago, Gloves said:

You might be misreading the original post.

1. OP goes to park w/ kids
2. A maskless child approaches him/his children
3. Due to OP's feelings regarding masks in a pandemic, he tells the child (presumably nicely) that they can't play with his kid(s) without a mask

This SHOULD be the end of it, for any reasonable parent. This was her chance to go "whatever, you don't HAVE to play with those kids" to her own child.

Now, likely 1 of 2 things happened in the next part, which is part of where OP maybe could have handled it more delicately, for me.

The child either:

1. Went back to their mother and told her verbatim what OP told them - you can't play with my kids without a mask
   1. OR
2. Went back to their mother and told her something closer to "the man said I need a mask to play"

See now, I do think #2 IS more likely - kids are simple. They see it all simple. It's this equals that. I can't play with the kids means I can't play at all, cuz that's the play I want.

If the kid went route 2, yeah maybe Mom is a bit justified in her mind saying "hey what the hell, how dare you tell my kid he needs a mask!" as that is not the rule (kids under 4 blah blah blah).

 

All that said, from OP's perspective, it basically ended at #3 waaay up at the top there, then suddenly he was confronted with an angry and seemingly unreasonable woman.

 

That's my takeaway.

I read the OP perfectly fine, where does it detail out anything about being confronted by an angry, unreasonable woman?  It doesn't at all, it sounds like he demanded directly to the mother that the kid wear a mask to play near him (that's almost verbatim with OP).  At most he has the right to ask her to keep her kid away from his at this point, she is not obligated to mask the kid at all.

[fcgamer | 4,722]

24 minutes ago, Boosted52405 said:

How did she escalate it, exactly?  By showing up without mask on kiddo?  Very little info was provided on what the Mom said, she really seemed to act about how any parent would act in that situation.  Totally agree she was in the wrong here too though, they both should have been masked for sure.

 

24 minutes ago, Boosted52405 said:

How did she escalate it, exactly?  By showing up without mask on kiddo?  Very little info was provided on what the Mom said, she really seemed to act about how any parent would act in that situation.  Totally agree she was in the wrong here too though, they both should have been masked for sure.

Why exactly do I have to agree with letting your kid play with mine? I think that's for each set of parents to decide and set parameters based on what the parents personally feel is okay.

The mother flies off the handle as likely she (a) hates to see her son sad, and (b) likely heard a version of accounts similar to what Gloves outlined. But she could have calmly asked the what actually happened, and then just left it at that. Then again, she'd likely also believe her kid's side of the story anyways over that of an adult stranger, so.