This is the last of the original Tales I wrote. However, I have one more after this. The last Tale I plan to share is the by far the most interesting so I decided to save it for the Grand Finale.  

This is one of my more recent Kijiji deals. It is long-winded and painful to even attempt to explain.  I have slowed down in my Kijiji Adventures ever since the market in my city exploded in the summer of 2012. Along with hunting for deals on Kijiji, I would also sell collectables I acquired over the years. Selling could be just as interesting as buying.

It began with a listing I had for an Iron Maiden boxset called Eddies Archive along with some Judas Priest statues. One rainy day at work, I get an email proposing a trade for a Jabba the Hutt sideshow statue (wonderful statue) for the Iron Maiden boxset. I am not a massive Star Wars fan but I do go through phases where I do collect but very specifically Phantom Menace items (Fight me!). I thought about it for a while then came to the conclusion that it would be a nice trade for me. I then proceeded to make a deal with this guy. So we went back and forth for a week or so before we lined up a deal for the following Sunday at around noon.

He wanted to meet in a notorious high traffic location, which was in a suburb just outside the city. This aggravated me right off the bat, since the traffic was in fact very heavy that day.  Therefore, once I arrived I emailed him that I had arrived at the meeting spot since this guy never had a cell. I waited and waited but never got a reply. I figured I would make the waiting time useful and went to the local Canadian Tire (typical Canadian hardware store) I bought new windshield wiper blades for my truck and installed them in the parking lot.... still nothing. Horribly defeated, after 2 hours of waiting I went home. I was beyond pissed off. I was stood up. My first time when selling something. I will never forget the anger.

However, this is not the end of the story. Oh no no no. It continues. You probably noticed that there was no mention of video games in this story!  Well this happened 3 years ago and over the course of the next 3 years, this same guy had been bugging me to do a deal. Repeatedly I told him to “beat it, I am not interested”. Even when I needed some cash for a bigger purchase, I did not give in. “This guy messed me around. I don't need his business,” I told myself. When I confronted him about not showing up, he did apologize but stated that he does not remember setting up the deal, then claiming he had family issues and he does not drive and blah blah blah.

Every time my ads expired on Kijiji and I reposted them, which is when he would contact me repeatedly. Finally after a long period of ignoring him,  I began to reply with absurd propositions just to bugger him up. He screwed with me so I will screw with him. Childish I know, but satisfying. I would ask insane amounts of money for something or ask to meet up in 5 minutes. I tried to be an asshole to deter him, but he never stopped. This guy was determined to get something from me.

I had sold most of the stuff he originally wanted, expect for one last item. An Ozzy Osbourne Prince of Darkness box set. He was very interested, so I asked if he had any video games. He mentioned he had a Final Fantasy VIII CIB (Greatest Hits) in minty condition. I finally broke and agreed to a deal my Ozzy set for his FFVIII. I had not done a deal in a while so I figured "what the hell".  

So once again, I was going to have to drive to the suburbs, the very same suburb that he had screwed me over once before. Yes, I know, I am stupid. I was to deal with a guy that screwed me over once already and a guy that was psychotically contacting me for 3 years. However, this is Kijiji and it is all a part of the glory that is Kijiji. 

Once again, I had to fight the traffic to get there. Once there, I parked at the meetup location and texted him. "Oh great" I thought, "at least he has a cell now". Guess what??  No reply.... shocked, I was not.  Then this older dude comes walking out of the Tim Hortons (Canadian Starbucks) in a leather coat, extra large coffee in one hand a plastic shopping bag in the other. He noticed me right away and walked to my truck. I got out of my truck to greet him. I had the Ozzy boxset in a large clear non-Ziploc bag.  

This is where the most painful part of all of this began, if you can imagine. I will try my best to describe this excruciating experience.

"Hello" I said as I extend my arm handing him the boxset and he did the same with the game. Then he proceeds to try to grab the bagged Ozzy boxset as he tries to hand me his FFVIII with the same hand. He is holding a coffee with the other hand remember... he was really starting to struggle and wiggle as he tried to do this with one hand.

Awkwardly, I grabbed the bag out of his hand and put the bagged boxset in his hand. I said “thank you”. Then instead of returning the thank you back to me, he looks very displeased and said "can I have my bag back". I was kind of half stunned since the Ozzy boxset I just gave him was already in a bag. Then he starts trying to get the boxset out of the bag with one hand, since he is still holding a coffee with the other remember... Not using his knees for assistance or the hood of my truck, which was right in front of him. As painful as this is to read, it was just as painful for me to watch it. I then quickly took the game out of "his" bag and put Final Fantasy on my driver’s seat.

I then snagged the bag he was still struggling with, pulled the boxset out dropping it back in “his” bag, and handed it back. A big smile arose from his face and he gingerly walked off swinging his bag in delight. I watched him walkway happy as a schoolgirl but I never did get a thank you.

I sat back in my truck and reflected on the past 3 years of dealing with this guy. More recently the new baggie incident I had just witnessed. All the frustration melted away and turned into senseless laughter. It all made sense to me now; he was a few chips short of a circuit board. I put some video game tunes on and enjoyed the drive home, traffic and all.